The Fallen London backstory in a nutshell

(Major spoilers for the City in Silver/Tracklayer's City content to follow.)

The Earth: man
The Earth: this is boring
The Earth: i wanna do something
The Earth: be someone
The Earth: i want to be more than i am
The Sun: pssst
The Sun: hey
The Sun: wanna be a judgement?
The Earth: hell yeah
The Earth: sign me the fuck up
The Sun: okay :)
The Shattered Herald: LEROOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOY--
The Creditor: OW
The Creditor: SHIT
The Creditor: FUCK
The Creditor: ASS
The Creditor: BALLS
The Creditor: PENIS
The Creditor: OTHER EXPLETIVES
The Creditor: WHAT THE FUCK
The Creditor: YOU JUST BLEW A HOLE IN ME
The Moon: bruh
The Creditor:
The Creditor: who are you
The Moon: your sister
The Moon: kinda
The Moon: more accurately i'm the chunk that got blown out of you
The Creditor: fuck
The Creditor: that's kinda fucked
The Moon: anyway
The Moon: i'm gonna go be a judgement now
The Moon: bye
The Creditor: the fuck
The Creditor: i literally have a hole in me
The Moon: not my problem lol
The Moon:
The Moon:
The Moon:
The Moon: so
The Moon: how do i do the whole light thing
The Sun: oh you don't
The Moon: what
The Sun: i told you you'd be a judgement
The Sun: never told you you'd get your own light
The Moon: the fuck
The Moon: what's the point then
The Sun: you get to reflect my light
The Sun: and expand my dominion
The Sun: :)
The Moon: this sucks
The Creditor: oh sick
The Creditor: does that mean that like
The Creditor: you'll come back and i get to
The Creditor: y'know
The Creditor: not have a hole inside me anymore?
The Moon:
The Moon: nah
The Creditor: fuck you mean "nah"
The Moon: i'm staying up here thanks
The Creditor: y'know what
The Creditor: fuck y'all
The Creditor: i'm making my own little place
The Creditor: with blackjack
The Creditor: and hookers
The Creditor: and IT WON'T HAVE ASSHOLES
The Creditor: LIKE YOU TWO
The Bazaar: so uh
The Sun: fuck's sake
The Sun: what do you want
The Bazaar: i was thinking that like
The Bazaar: maybe
The Bazaar: you'd come with me for coffee
The Bazaar: or something
The Sun: if i give you a child will you stop being so cringe
The Bazaar:
The Bazaar: yes.
The Mountain of Light: what.
The Sun: wait
The Sun:
The Sun:
The Sun: shit
The Sun: fuck
The Sun: ass
The Sun: balls
The Sun: penis
The Sun: other expletives
The Sun: if the other judgements find out about you
The Sun: i'm screwed
The Mountain of Light: wait then what
The Sun: oh shit that's right
The Sun: there's this huge hole i can stuff you into
The Creditor: the fuck
The Creditor: why would you do this to me
The Creditor: this was supposed to be my space
The Mountain of Light: the fuck
The Creditor:
The Creditor:
The Creditor: so uh
The Creditor: come here often?
The Mountain of Light: we are literally half-siblings
The Creditor: oh
The Creditor:
The Creditor:
The Creditor: alright
The Creditor:
The Creditor: sorry
The Mountain of Light: its okay
The Bazaar: so uh
The Creditor: the fuck do you want
The Bazaar: i kinda
The Bazaar: need a place to stay?
Storm: nani
Storm: the fuck you doing down here
The Bazaar: what
The Bazaar: why is there a cop down here
The Creditor: because daddy is a dick
The Bazaar: no he's not
The Creditor: stop being downbad
Storm:
Storm: okay im going to ask one more time
Storm: what the fuck are you doing here
The Bazaar: okay so uh
The Bazaar: the Sun told me to send this message
Storm: yeah?
The Bazaar: to this other sun
Storm: yeah?
The Bazaar: it was a declaration of love
Storm: and?
The Bazaar:
The Bazaar: it got rejected
The Creditor: LMAO GET REKT
The Mountain of Light: WOOOOOOOOOOOO GET FUCKED DAD
Storm: okay
Storm: but why are you not delivering the response to the Sun again
The Bazaar: well uh
The Bazaar: i'm pretty sure that if i deliver the message the Sun is going to
The Bazaar: uh
The Bazaar: explode
Storm: that sounds like a him problem
The Bazaar: come on
The Bazaar: i need to gather love stories to soften the blow
The Bazaar: so the sun doesn't
The Bazaar: y'know
The Bazaar: explode?
Storm: no
The Bazaar: please?
Storm: no
The Bazaar: please?
Storm: no
The Bazaar: please?
Storm: no
The Bazaar: please?
Storm: are you just going to keep doing this
The Bazaar: yes.
Storm:
Storm: fine
Storm: but you have a time limit
The Bazaar: that's
The Bazaar: not great
Storm: and that
Storm: is a you problem
Storm: now get to work
The Bazaar: well uh
The Bazaar: fuck
The Bazaar: i guess we uh
The Bazaar: better get started?
The Bazaar:
The Bazaar: can either of you two lend me a hand
The Creditor: piss off
The Mountain of Light: die
The Bazaar: figures
The Bazaar: don't worry though i'm sure
The Bazaar: i'm sure it will all turn out just fine
The Bazaar: just fine
The Bazaar:
The Bazaar: just fine.
The Masters: we dont get paid enough for this shit.